Marriage across the Boerewors Curtain

Growing up as a white English speaking kid in the ‘old South Africa” there was one group of people you did not associate with:

‘Dutchmen; Rockspiders; planks; hairybacks; crunchies’. The list of insults goes on and on. We were not left unscathed...'rooinek, soutpiel' are some of the names we were called.Nobody got away with be called something!

You played with your English buddies and had fistfights with the Dutchmen. You whistled at their sisters, but made sure you took a civilized chick to the Matric Dance.
You just did not date one of them. For fuck sakes, they didn’t even know how to dance! All they could do was go ‘sailing’, ‘langarm’ they call it! WTF? Who can dance like that? Stick your right arm out in the air and go whizzing clockwise round and round the room. Why could they not just be civilised and hop up and down in one spot in the middle of the dance floor, like normal people?

Time goes by…you grow up. You go to a party in Pretoria. And then…….

That dance style was their secret weapon. All the English speaking guys could see was these damn Dutchmen with their hands on the arses of some of the hottest chicks. Even more frustrating is watching the ‘’crunchies’ dance real closeup, in a style called ‘binneboud’. This is close to having sex standing up, but with your clothes on and in front of her mother/ father/ brother...

So you throw your years of prejudice away and go out with one of these chicks. Interesting. They feel soft in all the right places,( and make you hard in all the right places as well.)This could be fun! And so it goes. Before you know where you are, you have done the unmentionable. You married across that awful barrier.

The Boerewors Curtain! Your kids are gonna be little half-breeds! Shame on you.

But, as all men through the ages have discovered, a wife is a wife, no matter what language she speaks. You are a husband, a second class citizen in your own home. They all nag, they all bitch and they (nearly)all have a mother who thinks you are not worthy of their’ little angel.